Well, it’s been a minute.
I just took a look-see it my blog and I haven’t written at all this year! My word…well, and, it’s because I’ve been spewing my heart out over on LinkedIn trying to shake things up.
I truly can’t believe it’s almost June, I was just saying to my dad this week - I used to wish time away, I would say “if only I can make it the weekend”, “I wish this week would go faster”, and now as I am flowing with what lights me up in life, I don’t find the need to wish it away - in fact, it’s moving faster than it ever has before! Time is a construct that we as humans invented anyway, so all good.
How are we feeling 6 months into 2024? Or, if you live by the zodiac, we’re almost 2 months into the new year. I vibe more with the latter, I was thinking about what has transpired for me since I last wrote in November 2023 - I had just started to get my mojo back from experiencing a deep dark night of the soul.
You might think, what in the woo woo is that? Often times when our soul awakens, much of what has happened/is happening in our 3D world doesn’t quite match up with what our soul desires and our entire world kind of comes crashing down hence “dark” night. But, really it’s a huge up level in your growth overall. In my experience, it was the ultimate invitation into a healing that I had been avoiding for 40 years and it took SO much out of me, AND felt amazing at the same time.
Many will ask me - why must I heal or grow? Well, you don’t, because as humans we have full autonomy and free will - and, there is a very mindful awareness that you literally can’t exist in what has been up to now, so the only way to the other side is through it. This is where a guide through it is essential whether spiritual, career, personal, therapy - a trusted guide who is cheering you on and reassuring you that you’re going to be ok - but ultimately you must do it all yourself, and it can feel like you’re going a little crazy. So, again, a guide who understand what you’re experiencing is crucial to your journey.
Before my awakening, which really started 5-6 years ago, I had just been on autopilot and squeezing the bare minimum out of life - only living in the human experience - I would spill something, I would break something, someone would get mad at me - it was all happening TO me, I would absorb everything as happening TO me, woe is me - living in victim mode. I don’t say this to blame myself or anyone else experiencing this - it’s how we were raised, literally not one person living on this planet (as an adult) was raised for the world that we live in. So, we’re all figuring it out.
I began to realize that everything around me was happening FOR me, and it was also a realization of what I had created with the energy I had been putting out. It was all based on external validation and what others expected of me. I had to burn it all down to be able to sit in the discomfort, feel every bit of it, and dig deep to find out who I was at the core - yes it’s a lot, and yes it hurts, and yes it was worth it.
The first 3 months of 2024 my business was booming! I didn’t have much time for anything else and I was happy as a clam - and then in beautiful fashion, I had begun to reach back into my toolkit of fear, scarcity, and lack at a new level than before and am currently being asked to heal that - to find a new sense of stability, security, and safety without the connection to what I produce, gain, or “do”.
I’m spending this summer doing less “doing” and more flowing as when we allow the surrender and flow, the universe takes note that we are open to receive. And so it is.
Happy summer fam, it’s good to be back.